“If you're going to have our son look after the baby, don’t go to a postpartum care center”... Full-term pregnant daughter-in-law vents [What do you think?]

[Financial News] A woman expecting her second child has voiced frustration over her in-laws’ demand that she not leave their first child in her husband’s care and cancel her postpartum care center reservation. She says her in-laws, who had initially offered to cover the cost of the center, changed their attitude once their son was going to take care of the child.
A pregnant woman’s concerns were recently posted on an online community under the title, “My in-laws say I shouldn’t go to a postpartum care center for my second child.”
The post’s author, Ms. A, is currently full-term with her second child. She said she was upset by her in-laws’ changed attitude compared with when she had her first child.
When Ms. A gave birth to her first child, her in-laws reportedly promised to cover the cost of the postpartum care center, telling her, “No matter how many children you have, we’ll pay for the center, so don’t worry.”
Ms. A had been grateful for her in-laws’ consideration. But a conflict arose when plans for caring for her first child changed ahead of the birth of her second.
The original plan was for Ms. A’s mother to look after the first child while Ms. A was at the postpartum care center. But recently, her mother took a serious fall and was hospitalized, making it difficult for her to care for the child.
In the end, the couple changed their plans so that the husband would take paternity leave and look after their first child himself.
Her in-laws then demanded that Ms. A stay home to recover after giving birth instead of going to a postpartum care center. This was after they learned that her husband would be looking after the first child.
At first, her in-laws said their reason was that the first child might become anxious if separated from their mother.
Ms. A said her in-laws kept contacting her: “They called every other day and hounded me, asking, ‘Have you canceled the postpartum care center reservation?’”
Her in-laws later questioned her husband’s ability to care for a child as well. They reportedly said to Ms. A, “Men don’t know how to look after kids. Do you really have to leave it to our son?”
Ms. A claimed that her in-laws, who had not objected when her mother was going to care for the first child, were now trying to stop her from using a postpartum care center because their son would be looking after the child.
Regarding her in-laws’ changed attitude, Ms. A complained, “They didn’t say a word when my mom offered to look after the child, but I guess their blood started boiling when it was their own son doing it.”
She also questioned whether her in-laws’ demand ultimately meant they wanted her to take over childcare right after giving birth: “Isn’t this basically, ‘Don’t make my precious son suffer—have the daughter-in-law who just gave birth come out and look after the child’?”
Her in-laws also offered to give Ms. A the money for the postpartum care center if she canceled her reservation. They said she could use it to hire someone to help with housework and childcare.
But Ms. A decided to stick with her original plan to recover at a postpartum care center after giving birth.
Ms. A replied to her in-laws, “I’ll take good care of myself and recover. If the cost of the center is a burden, you don’t have to pay it.” She added that her husband could also care for the child, saying, “The baby’s dad is good with kids, too. If you’re really worried, Mom and Dad, come to our house and help look after the child.”
Ms. A was firm that she would go to the postpartum care center even if her in-laws did not cover the cost. She expressed her hurt, saying, “They feel sorry for their own son having to look after his own flesh-and-blood daughter, while apparently the daughter-in-law who bled giving birth has to take care of both the first and second child.”
Most of the online users who read her story supported Ms. A’s decision. Comments included, “Her husband’s response matters most,” “What is there to be proud of about not being able to look after your own child? She should go to the postpartum care center and have the dad look after the firstborn,” and “She said it very clearly.”

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