“You Invited People to the First and Second—Now the Third Too?” Debate Over Invitations to a Third Child’s First-Birthday Party [What Do You Think?]

[Financial News] Opinions were divided over a woman who planned to invite all her acquaintances to her third child’s first-birthday party, change dresses, and hold the event in two parts. She refused to change her plans despite her older sister and parents urging her to keep the celebration small and family-only, leading to conflict within the family.

A post titled “My younger sister insists on having two sessions for her third child’s first-birthday party—isn’t that too much of an imposition?” was recently posted on an online community.

The post’s author, identified as A, explained that her younger sister had initially said she would keep the party to a meal with family, but later changed her plans. A said, “My younger sister says she’s having a first-birthday party for her third child and plans to rent a dress, and she’s asking me to help choose one. She clearly said she’d keep it simple with just a family meal, but now she suddenly says she wants to invite all her acquaintances.”

A said she had been unhappy from the start that acquaintances were invited to the first child’s first-birthday party. “Since it was the first child, I tried to understand inviting acquaintances to the party. But honestly, I still wondered why she had to do that when it could have been just family,” she said.

The second child’s first-birthday party had also been an event with acquaintances invited. A said, “My younger sister invited all her acquaintances to the second child’s party too and changed into hanbok. But this time, she says she’ll wear a dress and hold the party in two parts, and she’s asking me to choose dresses for both.”

A tried to dissuade her younger sister, saying that acquaintances invited to these parties multiple times might feel burdened. She urged her to keep the third child’s first-birthday party just for family.
Her parents also suggested holding a small celebration with only family, but her younger sister stuck to her original plan.

The younger sister reportedly strongly pushed back against her family’s objections, saying she would pay for the event herself. A said, “She made a fuss, asking why they wouldn’t let her do it when they were paying for it with their own money. In the end, Mom gave up and said, ‘Fine, do what you want.’ Is it really necessary to invite acquaintances, wear a dress, and hold a first-birthday party when it’s not even the first child but the third?”

A also compared it with her own experience. A, who is married, said she celebrated her child’s first birthday with a meal attended by both sides of the family. “I just kept the celebration to a meal with my family and my in-laws, and we didn’t even do a doljabi. So what’s with having two sessions for a third child’s first-birthday party?” she added.

Online, opinions were split between those who said inviting acquaintances again to a third child’s first-birthday party would feel burdensome and those who said family had no reason to interfere in an event paid for personally.

Critical commenters reacted, saying, “Why wear a dress to a first-birthday party? This is so over the top.” “Does she not care at all about the acquaintances who would have to attend against their will?” “A third child’s first-birthday party is surprising enough, but splitting it into two parts is something she’ll hear about for years as an imposition on others.” “Just leave her alone. People like that will do whatever they want, no matter what anyone says.”

Others said, “I’m in favor, even though I’m not family, as long as she doesn’t accept cash gifts,” and “What does it matter if she’s paying for it herself?” Another commenter wrote, “Will she be able to deal with the gossip she’ll hear behind her back later?”


[email protected] Han Seung-gon Reporter