Inheritance Disputes Begin at the Holiday Dinner Table [The Puzzling World of Inheritance]

[Financial News] Law offices become busy with phone calls after the Chuseok holiday ends. Long-shelved issues erupt among family members who have gathered in one place for the first time in a long while. People often say divorce consultations increase immediately after the holidays. In my experience, however, consultations related to inheritance increase just as much. "I only learned recently that my father had transferred the apartment to my eldest brother alone," and "My youngest sibling manages my mother's bank account, but the balance looks strange." It weighs heavily on me to see siblings arrive carrying inheritance documents in the same hands that had been shaping songpyeon.

I handled family and inheritance cases for many years while serving as a judge. At Suwon Family Court, I presided over numerous inherited-property division cases as a family and juvenile specialist judge. Through that experience, I came to understand one thing clearly: The seeds of most inheritance disputes are planted while the parents are still alive. Today, I would like to share something I hope families returning from the holiday will take a moment to consider.

When I listen to the parties from the bench during inherited-property division proceedings, the subject of their dispute is clearly property. But if I listen a little more closely, I can hear the real stories beneath it. "My parents always favored my older brother from the time we were young," "I took care of all of my father's medical needs, but now they want to divide the property equally," and "My older sister received a house when she got married, but I received nothing." Decades of accumulated resentment pour into the courtroom all at once with the loss of the parents.
That is why inherited-property division cases are difficult even for judges. Cases that appear relatively simple when viewed solely through their legal issues can still lead the parties to fight fiercely without giving an inch. Beneath the dispute lies a desire to have one question answered: 'Which child did our parents love more?' The court cannot rule on those feelings. All it can do is divide the property according to the standards established by law.


In practice, two issues tend to generate the sharpest disputes. One is a 'special benefit,' and the other is a 'contribution share.'
A special benefit is a system under which, if one of the co-heirs received a gift from the parents during their lifetime, that amount is treated as an inheritance share received in advance and is reflected in the calculation. The problem is that proving what qualifies as a special benefit is more difficult than it may seem. Money given decades ago for a child's marriage, funds transferred for business purposes, and money gradually withdrawn from accounts held in the parents' names often leave no records or depend solely on the parties' memories. Ultimately, the parties must trace old transaction records one by one through orders to produce financial transaction information and other means. In the process, distrust among the siblings deepens further.
A contribution share is an additional share recognized for an heir who provided exceptional support to the parents or made an exceptional contribution to maintaining or increasing their assets. Courts, however, do not recognize contribution shares as readily as people may expect. Caring for one's parents is generally regarded as a basic duty of family members. Living with a parent for many years and providing medical care is not enough by itself; the heir must specifically prove that the contribution was 'special' and went beyond ordinary family support. I have seen many heirs plead in court, "I cared for my mother for 10 years," only to feel devastated when they received little or no contribution share.

What, then, can be done to reduce disputes? The best approach is to help parents clearly record their wishes regarding their property while they are still healthy.
First, they can leave a will. A will is valid only if it strictly follows the formal requirements set by law. The most common type, a holographic will, requires the testator to personally write the entire text, the date, address, and name, and affix a seal. If even one of these elements is missing, the entire will may be invalidated. I have seen numerous cases in court where a will expressing a parent's wishes lost its validity because the day was omitted from the date or the address was incomplete. Whenever possible, using a notarized will is the safer option.
Second, if a lifetime gift was made, the circumstances and purpose of the gift should be documented. If parents provided a particular child with marriage or housing funds, they can substantially reduce future disputes simply by stating themselves whether the support was intended as an advance on that child's inheritance or was separate from it.
Third, records should be kept of support and caregiving. Children who care for their parents should routinely organize hospital-visit records, caregiving expenses, and living expenses paid on their parents' behalf. When claiming a contribution share, objective evidence is far more persuasive than an emotional appeal.
Fourth, the reserved share must be taken into account. Even if parents make a will leaving their property primarily to one child, the other children may claim the minimum share guaranteed by law—the reserved share. Estate planning that ignores the reserved share may instead trigger an even larger dispute.



Bringing up inheritance is not easy. Discussing property in front of one's parents can feel disrespectful, while raising the subject among siblings may create concern about being seen as greedy. As a result, most families put off the conversation. Then, after the parents die, they discuss and hear one another's innermost feelings for the first time in court.
When I look back on the inherited-property division cases in which mediation was successfully concluded while I was a judge, they shared one common feature: The parents had explained their wishes to their children several times during their lifetime. The children did not necessarily agree with those wishes, but they at least knew what their parents had wanted. That difference completely changed the atmosphere in the courtroom.
The holidays are one of the few opportunities for the entire family to gather in one place. If there was something you were unable to bring up at this year's Chuseok dinner table, I encourage you to discuss it calmly while your parents are still healthy. Inheritance is the final message parents leave to their children. For that message to become a bond that keeps the family together rather than a spark for conflict, the conversation must begin while the parents' voices can still be heard.

(Kim Tae-hyung, partner at Barun Law) Kim Tae-hyung is a specialist in family and inheritance law. After being appointed to the bench in 2007, he ended his 17-year judicial career in 2024 after serving as a presiding judge at Suwon Family Court and joined Barun Law. During his time as a judge, he handled family, inheritance, and juvenile proceedings for a total of eight years beginning in 2012. In particular, he handled numerous family and inheritance cases as a family and juvenile specialist judge at Suwon Family Court during the five years before his retirement, from 2019 to 2024, establishing his expertise in the field. He is also the author of the bestseller *Inheritance, Divorce, Juvenile Trials, and the Court as Explained by a Chief Judge* (Pakyoungsa Publishing, 2023).   


[email protected] Kim Young-kwon Reporter