[fn Square] The Friendly Survive

The new year has dawned, but everywhere you look, the news is bleak. The incomprehensible insurrection seems to be punished by a special investigation, yet old problems resurface, making the world noisy again. Among these, the most striking is the abuse of power by Members of Parliament (MPs), considered some of the most influential figures in Korean society. Watching this bizarre situation unfold, I was reminded of a book I read long ago: 'Survival of the Friendliest' (2021) by Brian Hare, an evolutionary anthropologist at Duke University, and his wife and writer, Vanessa Woods. The original title, 'Survival of the Friendliest,' literally means 'the survival of the kindest.'
This book begins by pointing out that we have long misunderstood Charles Darwin, the 'father of evolution.' According to the authors, the widely known concept of 'survival of the fittest' was not even coined by Darwin. He merely used the term 'struggle for existence' as a metaphor while explaining 'natural selection.' Later scientists misinterpreted 'the fittest' as 'the strongest,' 'the most powerful,' or 'the most ruthless,' confining Darwin's ideas to a narrow and simplistic framework. By this logic, it is easy to accept the pessimistic view that 'human nature is inherently flawed.' However, Darwin also observed that 'nature is a world full of sociability and cooperation.'
The most dramatic illustration of this is the famous 'entangled bank' metaphor that closes the final chapter of 'On the Origin of Species.' 'It is interesting to contemplate an entangled bank, clothed with many plants of many kinds, with birds singing on the bushes, with various insects flitting about, and with worms crawling through the damp earth.' Building on this idea, Brian Hare and Vanessa Woods, authors of 'Survival of the Friendliest,' state, 'When other intelligent human species failed to thrive, Homo sapiens succeeded because we excelled at a particular form of cooperation.' When the first edition of this book was published, then-President Moon Jae-in wrote a recommendation, noting, 'The prosperity of society and the state also depends on cooperation and communication skills.'
However, it is nearly impossible to find any trace of kindness in the language and attitude of MPs accused of abuse of power in recent newspaper reports. Take the case of Kim Byung-kee, for example. In my view, the fundamental cause of the allegations against him lies in conflicts with his aides. While there is debate about how information was obtained, it is understandable that he dismissed his aides over inappropriate conversations in a group chat. However, allegedly pressuring a company regarding the employment of a former aide who had to find a job in the private sector seems excessive. This is where Pandora's box was opened. Even in the Joseon Dynasty, there was a rule: 'Dismissal is allowed, but do not confiscate their land.'
Perhaps because of the directness of the recorded audio, the case of former MP Lee Hye-hoon is even more shocking. 'Can't you understand Korean?' 'Is your IQ in the single digits?' 'Do you just say whatever you want because you have a mouth?' 'Hey! Hey! I really wish I could kill you.' There is not a hint of kindness in this string of harsh words. Even if the rest could be overlooked, it would have been better if she had not said the last one. It is bewildering, especially since Lee wrote in her 2014 book 'Why Do We Do Politics?' that 'The standard distinguishing advanced from less developed countries is whether there are effective mechanisms to prevent the privileges, unfairness, and tyranny of the powerful.'
The opposite of kindness is rage, extreme anger, and fury. We have already seen people ruin not only their country but also their own lives by succumbing to such extremes. The authors of this book, who could be called 'Darwin’s heirs,' write in the preface, 'We aim to show how kindness became an advantageous strategy in human evolution,' and add, 'We will also explore the dark side of kindness—the ability to be cruel to those who are not our friends.' They are optimistic that 'if we can understand how this dual nature evolved, we may find new solutions to the social and political polarization threatening democracies around the world.' The answer lies in cooperation and communication based on sensitivity to others—in other words, kindness.
jsm64@fnnews.com Reporter